Why do I use the term "PLUG"?
It is meant to represent the concept of energy and flow...
and the control we CAN have over it.
If we so choose.
But before I go any further, I must draw attention to the importance
&
the pertinence of neurolinguistics in my very own trial of reclamation and recovery.
"Harnessing" is the word I prefer;
in lieu of "control ".
Go on!
Try IT!
"I choose to harness my energy for the better good."
VERSUS
"I am controlling myself for the better good."
Doesn't it just hit different ?!?!!
Some of us out here, unfortunately have to work diligently to manage our overall health and wellbeing;
just in order to survive.
We do so by plugging into our intuition and in some cases, unplugging from the every day grind or,
completely cutting the cords that link us to deconstructive sources.
During this time...
when one purposefully pulls themselves from the outlets of society,
it is with the intention to "relocate" and "recalibrate" our own internal system, whether we realize it or not.
But what happens after we pull out from our typical day,
our typical habits,
and in some cases,
leave an entire lifestyle behind?
All this in an attempt to
accept the responsibility of self;
to do the unique & necessary work...
to get to the point where we like ourselves a latte more than we do the chaos and approval that is often mistakenly perceived as necessary in order to be accepted in this standard - habitually driven life?
Often times, even though we are quite ready to re-acclimate into the SAME society that we released ourselves from,
it doesn't mean that they are ready for us.
Sometimes, they don't even answer the door, the texts -
the sober invites.
Sometimes, they don't come calling ever again.
This is ok. Let it be.
My experience has been challenging but rewarding. I now believe this to be a very easy, or, natural way of clearing the table;
to make room for the new nourishment.
Creating space;
even for some guilty pleasures!
In truth, it takes a lot less energy and effort if we simply let them clear their own place settings.
It leaves us with a few more drops of precious energy for ourselves.
For saturation of our clarity;
reserved for making really important decisions.
For investment in our future development.
So - Friends,
please DON'T TAKE IT PERSONAL.
Now,
on the contrary to lack of flow,
Sometimes they do come knocking, ready to pour yesterday's brew;
but we don't want them to.
THIS part is hard.
The part where,
we have no ill feelings toward the society that we once belonged;
but we also know deep down in our core,
we are no longer part of theirs.
We now belong to a different sect of society but yet, can't identify exactly which one.
We just don't feel as though we fit...
anymore.
But did we ever really? Fit in?
Or were we just contorting ourselves.
This FEELING OF NOT BELONGING may be super duper draining for our root chakra - the place where the energy for "inclusion" lives.
It can make re-connecting so difficult that it is tempting to give up all the efforts.
To just stay ALONE.
Trust me,
in the beginning,
-it is very common to experience the discomfort of what we have unbecome.
It's terrifying; if
We don't know how to reconnect with our family,
our friends,
our community.
And then we wonder why the hell we ever started -to stop- to begin with!
It can seem lonelier and scarier than before.
This is true for me, my mental health and overall well being.
It took me about 3 years to recalibrate after I cut the cords to my past life.
To do the work I needed to do;
to be able to care for Me.
One day, I think I can talk about how I reintroduced myself to my family,
and friends.
For today though, my focus is on:
community.
I begin there because that was the question I received most recently.
"How do I do it? I just don't know how", She said.
So,
in True Tara Style,
I will answer.
In bits and pieces.
Over a slow period of time.
I will probably end up going a little bit backwards and even a little side - ways,
in an attempt to explain how I did it.
I do so, only in an effort to help someone who is a couple stepping stones back as compared to where I currently stand. I feel confident & comfortable admitting that I know there are others on the same path, perhaps with slightly different reasons for stepping out and then stepping back, but they're there.
The first piece I can suggest, regarding the "How", is:
Set up a routine.
Start with, meeting a NEW friend,
in a different than before, easy to access,
local coffee shop.
Talk. Start simple & small, but don't ever accept or participate in anything shallow.
Plunge into deep, meaningful interactions, even if you might not EVER see that person again or in real life. The heart center doesn't know the difference. It only remembers the divine interaction had there. The love and support felt through each warm sip of authentic connection will be powerful, I promise.
I did this! I "listened to my own lecture".
Now I meet my new friend once a week (when we can),
and we don't hold back.
We've gotten pretty close quite fast.
Thanks to the 3 year time out I took - I find myself more often than not,
GROUNDED and finally,
capable to hold a standing time and date with a like-minded person from my community. Shoot, I even did the initiation!
I feel secure and safe to say that I think this time,
This routine is for the WIN!
I no longer worry about if it will work out to perfection or be sustainable,
or if she will like me after knowing all she now knows.
Instead of giving myself up to the "what ifs",
I fix a hard focus on the here and now.
It is NOT always easy. I literally have to reassure myself internally, with thoughts like:
"Regardless of how long it lasts or doesn't,
each time I sync with her,
I am left with a powered up battery that is properly prepared for whatever is next."
So I go on. And I try it.
Pertinent to mention:
I always leave our space,
with a conscious but silent intention,
which is just a fancy term,
sometimes used by me instead of the word "PRAYER":
THAT SHE TOO FEELS THE PRODUCTIVE POWER OF OUR ALIGNMENT.
Sometimes I get greedy and add this wish:
THAT SHE TOO CAN USE THIS ENERGY BOOST FOR SOMETHING DESIRABLE.
As can be deduced, the aftershock of these meetings proves powerful.
So,
starting next Monday, from 9:30-10:30am CST,
until I decide otherwise,
I will be sitting alone,
peacefully
yet consciously,
In a special space,
With something to sip,
Waiting silently and holding space
for YOU... I mean, just in case you are looking for a simple, slow start in the marathon of RETURNING yourself to "Us" - post taking a mental health break from the old scene and the old style.
Between now and next week,
I will be creating the platform in which I will be open for more.
More comfortable,
more conscious conversation and
more connection.
To help shine light for any who are struggling with their re-introduction into community.
I've already done it and so far,
I am happier than I have ever been.
My cup is not always full - but I sure as hell know,
NOW,
how to fill it when I want or need to.
And, since I am feeling this abundant way, maybe I can brew up a little extra for you too!
Stay tuned for an extremely easy, more specific and if you so choose, interactive, Monday Mental Health and Wellness Day Experience.
Although I am not practicing as your chiropractor or your coach on that day, there is one Universal Rule that still applies just as it did and does for those other two gigs;
I go by
Even if it is just me and one other person (silent or speaking) - I will be there "with you" along with many other silent but power-filled survivors.
Today, on this Monday,
I choose to empathize and albeit from a distance, to share my resources, ideas and experiences...
Because that alone feeling is pretty overwhelming sometimes...
Isn't it?
"I am not alone. I am worthy. I am capable and willing."
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